If you are like me, you want to be a force of positive change in the world.
Then, very likely, you are incredibly familiar with the idea that changing ourselves is the key to changing the world for the better, am I right? That as our own shifts happen and transformation shapes this improved version of ourselves, you start to relate to others in a different way.
The secret to creating positive change in the world is really very simple then, isn’t it? We look to ourselves and focus on our own processes. Then, growth ripples out, exponential rings of your intention. Yes. Very true, but we are not truly alone in this world, moving along a path solo in most cases. We relate with others every day, also on their individual paths so more complicated does our own traveling become.
I have good news! Some of the best growth comes from relating and growth within relationships, every one an opportunity. With conscious intention, we can use our relationships to expand ourselves and create an even more powerful force with which to change the fabric of our collective existence. How’s that for #goals?
How do we have the most personal growth and craft the best relationships ever?
I will give you an example of a romantic relationship. One common scenario is that at first, we show our best side. This is typical. This is a time where infatuation is high, and it’s like a honeymoon. Say this lasts, 3 to 6 months but then there is a shift. The feelings change perhaps, it’s just not the passion that it was at the beginning. What happened? We ask ourselves. What can I do?
Relationship Hack #1
1. Set your best intentions – intentions are the soil in which all of our relationships grow. The more positive and pure our intentions are the better relationships we will have. The great thing is that our intentions can change. No matter what the motivation that you started with you can make a conscious choice and set better intentions in your relationships. To take time to adjust your intentions and communicate that to your partner and that could be the turning point in your relationship.
2. Give people the best of yourself – often the issue could be because we stopped placing our love interest first and instead of showing them our best, we got comfortable, we took them for granted. The relationship could end at this point. For many of us, this has ended our relationships. I have learned the hard way and have had to grow from the mistakes that I have made. However, using the ideas above at the outset, setting intentions with conscious awareness and giving people the best of yourself, changes the game, doesn’t it? You have tools to access where you will go from here.
Relationship Hack #2
The concept of masculine and feminine energies. We are talking about energies here so this isn’t about gender. It is about the energy you present the most. Both masculine and feminine energies work in our lives and exist within us. A woman can have dominant masculine energy, or a man can have dominant feminine energy. Ideally, we are balanced and comfortable with both in us.
Masculine energy can present as a desire to be of service or a protector. This energy is defined by the risk takers, decisive action takers, logical thinkers, and competitors. These energies drive our adventure and significance in our lives. Who do you know that identifies with this energy?
The feminine energy is about intuition and creativity, vulnerability, openness. It is defined by people that are nurturing, sensitive, collaborative, and expressive. These are the energies that drive love and connection in our lives.
How do these energies play out in your life?
How do these energies influence your life?
The truth is that to be whole we need both the masculine and feminine energies. This is why when two people come together they often feel that they “complete one another”. They are fulfilling the needs that the other person is lacking. Hence the phrase, “opposites attract”. However, this is also often what makes relationships so difficult later on. In relationships, we must constantly be willing to put in the work to grow together and understand one another.
So, our goal is to be a force for positive change in ourselves and others. We understand these masculine and feminine energies influence our action and reactions and how we relate to others. Our masculine and feminine energies influence how we try to fulfill our deepest needs.
There are basic needs that all of us as humans share. These drive us all and in understanding your one needs and the need of your partner, you can create deeply satisfying relationships. It is often our top two deepest needs that drive everything that we do in life. What are yours?
1. The need for Certainty – we must feel like we are stable and that we have control over our world.
2. The need for Uncertainty – we all get bored easily and long for the fun of variety.
3. The need for Significance – we all want to feel like we are the most important person in the world to someone. We have that need to be valued, at work, at home, and with friends.
4. The need for Love and Connection – we want to be loved and need human connection. It is the purest form of humanity.
5. The need for Growth – if we are not growing we become dissatisfied with life and this often leads to depression, a difference between our reality and what we think our reality should be, focusing on the past.
6. The need for Contribution – We have a deep need to give back to the people around us. This is ultimate fulfillment when we can leave a legacy of the world that we have created.
Our personal transformation happens when we understand our own needs that we are trying to meet which is ultimately subconsciously driving our decisions. I have gone through points in my own life where I struggled with my two deepest needs being significance and certainty. When that was coupled with my masculine influence, I wanted so badly to “be somebody” that when things did not turn out the way that I planned I was angry and depressed. As my mindset was changed, by my personal transformation, I learned what really fulfilled my deepest needs is contribution and growth. It was the influence of my feminine energy that caused me to dig deep and realize how much I desire to help people find their own transformation. In doing so I continue to grow, so I can serve others better.
So I leave you with these questions, are you ready to move to the next level? Are you ready to take control of your relationships and your own transformation? Are you ready to take responsibility for the legacy that you are leaving behind? If the answers are yes, we have an opportunity to take a journey to explore how to make the best impact on the world around us. We all play an integral part in the evolution of our planet. As we discover our needs, our energies, and our talents we can discover our forum to help the world become a better place. Let’s take this journey together.